#EmpathyActionStories - Empathy Action

Meet the Makers: Florence, Lorna and Mary

Meet the women who hand sew the colourful juggling balls we sell. Our friends at Pursue Kenya run a programme that enables them to meet weekly. Based in the village of Shirotso in Western Kenya, they make the balls from scraps of fabric (Kitenge) donated by local tailors and filled with a local lentil called ndengu.

But it’s not just about what they make.

Each of the women who attends the workshops is a widow. The workshops allow them to discover new skills, forge new friendships, gossip and have fun. Leanne Coggan of Pursue Kenya explains:

Before any of the widows became involved…the majority of them had been ostracised by their communities and were isolated and very low in mood. Many of them had not had someone visit them for years, and felt unloved and worthless, and that their lives lacked purpose or hope.”

Leanne works closely with Florence, Lorna and Mary – she says they are some of her favourite people – and explains that this group of just three craft the juggling balls. The group was originally larger, but health issues have had an impact.

All the widows live below the poverty line and subsistence farming is a way of life for the women. Each day they work their land, tend to livestock, and fetch water and firewood. In addition, they all care for several grandchildren whose parents have left rural life for cities in search of jobs. These extra responsibilities of feeding, educating and meeting their grandchildren’s medical needs are hard to bear. Especially as – being widows who have not brought sons to their families – they occupy the lowest social status in their communities.

These are some of the things the widows have said since joining the workshops:

I had not been hugged for so long. My first hug from Ceciliah (of Pursue Kenya) woke up something in me and now I get hugs all the time!“

People in the community like me because they see I must matter to be visited by white people! I am not lonely and I am so happy because I know I am loved and have friends.“

My life has a purpose now, everything has changed, yesterday I was nobody, today I am a big someone and everyone knows it!“

Mary is the youngest of the three widows. When her husband died, she was blamed for his death and shunned by family and friends. At her lowest point, she considered suicide. But Leanne says that, since being able to generate an income through the sale of the juggling balls, Mary hasn’t stopped smiling and (up until the pandemic) always had a house full of friends. She has been appointed the role of secretary for the wider Pursue group and when asked recently how she felt about Pursue Kenya, she said:

It has given me back my life but even more than it was!“

The impact of Covid-19

Leanne explains that their struggle for food has been heightened. The local market places – where the women both sell and buy food – have been closed. In addition, several of them rely on money sent back from a relative working in the city. The loss of jobs has meant that this money is no longer being received. And the women’s grandchildren are currently receiving no education at all as schools are closed until at least January.

Nor are the widows able to meet up as usual or get their hugs – but they know this will not be forever, and that their lives have already changed for the better.

What better way to start helping others than by learning to juggle this Christmas. Thank you for helping to support these wonderful women, especially in such challenging times. To see the amazing juggling balls, please visit our shop.

Every one of our ethical gifts is made by people whose lives are improved with the purchases you make: they gain an income and a purpose, and they are given the opportunity to come together with others and contribute to their communities in a meaningful way.

Gratitude In Uncertain Times

This week saw the launch of our Christmas campaign. It also saw England enter into another lockdown. Once again, we collectively face a period of change and uncertainty. Without doubt, these continue to be challenging times.

During the first lockdown, we reflected upon what this time of change was teaching us: we shared stories, baked bread and reached out, via our Rainbow campaign, to those who had touched us with their kindness and resilience. Now, with darker nights and the prospect of a different festive celebration, we remember the flipside of lockdown for many: loneliness, fear and anxiety.

That is why reaching out to each other matters more than ever. In every challenge, there are glimpses of light and hope. This Christmas, our campaign is focussed upon expressing gratitude; telling someone – a friend, carer, key worker, family member – how grateful we are for their presence, for their kindness, and for their help.We know it has taken, and will take, a lot of great people to get us through. We want to help you say a huge ‘thank you’.

It couldn’t be simpler. Choose from our range of ethically made gifts and add a gift message expressing your gratitude. We will send your gift and message, beautifully handwritten on a postcard, to your chosen recipient. In addition, each purchase of one of our gifts helps their maker raise their community out of poverty.

We believe that, even in the most trying of times, focussing on gratitude can help lift us all. We’d love your help to share our message of thanks.

#foryoubecause #empathyaction #chooseempathy #empathyactionstories

Learning How To Make A Fuss

Before the summer break, as part of our online journal, we featured our amazing volunteer, Vix. Vix was born with hearing loss and, in her brave and brilliant blog, entitled I am Deaf she has been exploring her deafness and its impact upon her life. We loved her latest instalment ‘Learning how to make a Fuss…’ It reminded us all of the importance of raising our voices to change the world, both for ourselves and others.

With Vix’s permission, we have reprinted an extract from her blog post below.

During these interesting times, putting aside my husband’s cancer diagnosis and treatment, home schooling, too many hospital visits to mention, all the mask wearing, temperature taking challenges, zoom call etiquette – I thought – why not add to my stress levels and look for a new job? I currently work part time but needed to increase our income.

For too long I’ve been hiding and not telling people I have a disability and I have actually not been doing myself any favours. I’ve struggled in the past because I’ve not told teachers/lecturers/managers that I need to lipread because it feels like I am drawing attention to myself and I am someone who likes to blend in with the background. I remember one lecturer who faced the whiteboard for almost the whole hour and I hadn’t heard a thing! I’ve sometimes told myself that I don’t need to say anything, but will speak up if I need to further down the line. Then somehow I’ve talked myself out of it as it’s terrifying to speak out in a lecture hall with a hundred other students. It goes against every fibre of my being to stand out and say to everyone, look at me! But I am different from hearing people, I am unique and there’s no one like me.

My deafness is a part of who I am and even when doing something like filling in job application forms, I’ve dithered over whether to put down that I have a disability. Sometimes I’ve ticked the box and sometimes I haven’t. I personally feel it’s almost too extreme to put disability. I’ve wondered about whether it’s possible to change the wording and just put deaf. I don’t see myself as ‘disabled’ but I am deaf. I am perfectly able. In this instance, I ticked the disabled box and explained that I needed to lipread and see people’s faces.

I have to stop worrying about what other people think and I have to get rid of that mindset that I’m making too much fuss. If I’m booked to go on a training course I have to make the trainer aware of my needs and to be honest, it still feels uncomfortable doing it. I always wonder what the other people on the course think and whether they think I’m just making a fuss. I still have to do quite a few zoom calls and will let people know from the beginning but again, I wish I didn’t have to sometimes. I’m used to hiding in the background but, by doing that, I’ve let myself down. I need to tell people so I can make my life easier and it puts me more in control of the situation. I need to stand up for me.

I actually ended up applying for two jobs and had four interviews in total. Two using zoom and two face to face. I ‘made a fuss’ and I explained how to make zoom accessible to me. Both the face to face interviews were outside and, in that environment, we were able to talk without masks. The interviewers were happy to repeat questions and were aware of the impact of background noise on our conversation.

By the way, I got the job and I can’t wait to start!

Thank you so much Vix, for sharing your story with us. Please do follow Vix’s brilliant blog here.

We’d love to hear your stories about empathy both for yourself and others. Please do get in touch!

Building Connection in Uncertain Times

At Empathy Action we thrive on building connections with people, with organisations and with communities. We believe that sharing stories binds us together and creates the space for empathy to grow. Our simulations, our handicrafts, our conversations, all share this purpose.

While we had hoped that the start of the new school year might herald a return to a new normal, times are still very uncertain and the parameters of what is possible are changing daily. Yet we would love to focus on how, despite these challenges, we can connect to each other and to our communities both here and across the globe.

Over the summer we have been considering how we reach out to each other, examining ways of running our Empathy programmes virtually and how we can replicate the experience of our Empathy Exercises while keeping everyone safe. It’s a challenge but it is one we are very much up for! Early next month, we hope to run a Covid-secure Poverty Trap experience within a school setting and we are also focussing on our incredible handicrafts, hoping to replicate the outreach and success of our Rainbow campaign over the summer.

Going forward, we aim to deliver more Empathy experiences and programmes virtually and, where possible and safe, in person. If you are interested in volunteering with us or if you’d like to know more, please do get in touch.

And keep watching this space, as over the next few weeks, we share the ever-evolving stories of our makers and their products as they too adapt to our changing world.

Time for Reflection

As the summer holidays begin, we asked our incredible Team Empathy to reflect upon these unprecedented few months and share what has resonated with them most during this time.

We’ve collated their reflective words below.

We hope that these words also resonate with you. They remind us of what we have learned and what we can choose to take with us as we emerge from this time of crisis.

We wish you all a peaceful and restful summer. We’re so looking forward to sharing more Empathy ideas and stories with you in the autumn!